Thursday, November 24, 2016

The Line After "Before" and Before "After"


Once the role of Raavan was played by me when I was 14. After 14 more years, I got married. As bizarre as it might sound, there is a very evident connection between these two. No, it has nothing to do with me kidnapping/eloping with a girl. The common element is nothing but a "Dhoti" ("Dhuti" in Bengali). While playing Raavan, I was informed that I looked more like a farmer of paddy field (short length Dhoti), than a king. But I like to believe that in the second occasion, I pulled it off ("rocked it" as I like to actually believe).

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This post is simply the first formal entry when my life got converted into an "after" from what it now realizes to be a "before". And, I am not trying to make the world more knowledgeable by sharing any sort of "expertise" here that I might have expected to gather in my one and half years of married life, I am only sharing some of the observation I made during the wedding days. 
(All of these are from the groom's perspective).
Here goes:

1. Smile. Always.
Very important. Just keep smiling continuously for whole span of the week, in the middle of which is your wedding (like Thursday to Wednesday, if you are getting married on a Sunday). You will never fully know who/when/where/how is taking your photograph and where they are going to be shared over your friend's (friend's friend's) social media circle (tagging you). I cannot stress upon this enough.

2. Learn to wear a dhuti. No Exception.
NO! Dont rely on the new ready-made elastic ones. Even if you arrive at the venue wearing an elastic one, you wont be wearing them throughout the ceremony. You will be disrobed to your "inners" (in private of course!) and a new set of "authentic" dhuti will be wrapped around you by a paramanik gentleman. That is what you will be wearing till the next morning. So, your prestige (in front of your new in-laws) lies in your skill to control it and re-wrap it properly in any event (foreseen or accidental) of its folds' integrity being compromised. Think about it.

3. Just because it's your wedding, the laws of Physics, Chemistry and Economics do not change. They rather double in impact.
- In a residence meant for fifteen people at max, there are bound to be collisions if suddenly fifty people start moving inside the same cubic feet of space, looking for something to do.
- Glasses are brittle and the height of your house is not enough to defy earth's gravity.
- Certain material are more ignition friendly than others. Keep watch.
- The service provider will continue to mean business.
- The chemicals in your body (catalyst-ed by your anxiety hormones), will continue to show reactions to certain food groups/weather conditions.
- Cars are not capable of flying (not yet at least) out of a traffic jam.

The point is - Panicking or Shouting (or hiding) does not change science. So no use attempting those. Preparation and patience (and hard cash) might lead to a resolution quicker, especially when your bathroom rights or your birthright to enter your own paternal house are in serious question.


Apart from these, there is just one more thing that seemed very important to me, that actually divides my time of life into a before and an after. Its a promise. A silent one. Not to anyone else, but to myself. Wont dwell upon its details here (or anywhere else) but will definitely mention that me being the one who is fully aware of all of its terms and conditions, I have all the intentions to keep it. Keep it as good as it was on its Day One.


Well... See you in my next post.
Cheers! :)

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